Tis the Season
by Night Skye Tears
Summary: Christmas time for Dante and Trish, where better to go then the mall! yeah...Dante didnt like the idea either...but what transpires will make a very merry Christmas indeed. Completed(a year later I know) Hope you Enjoy!
1. Christmas Cheer

            The black Lexus strolled into the last visible parking space. "I'm not going. You can't make me damn it." The silver haired man in crimson and leather, growled from the passenger seat.

            "Oh yes I can. We're going." The petite blond woman said sternly. The tall man next to her crossed his gloved arms. "Do you know how ridicules you look right now, Dante?"

            "Trish, of all the things for you to do to me, you do this." Dante exclaimed. "Demons are one thing, but this....this is unnatural." He paused. "This is just cruel."

            "Of for God's sake! It's just the mall! It's not the Underworld!"

            "I would welcome that right about now." He mumbled.

            "Get out of the car, we're going." Trish glared at Dante when he didn't move. "Fine." she pushed open her door slamming it behind her. "You wanna be a baby about it, fine." Trish walked a couple of cars away before pushing the car alarm button.

            "Jesus Christ!" Dante hit his head on the ceiling, before leaping out of the Lexus. "Damn it Trish!"

            Trish chuckled as Dante stalked towards her. "Oh, you decided to come?" She smiled.

            "Bite me." He muttered.

            "Heh heh."

            "Let's get this over with." The two of them opened the glass doors and stepped up the stairs into the food court.

            Tinsel and colored balls were spread around hanging from the ceiling. Christmas music played overhead. "Christ." Dante sighed.

            "Christ-_mas_. 'Tis the season'." Trish chimed.

            "Spare me." Dante rolled his eyes.

            "Well let's get started." Trish said grabbing his arm and led him through the 'court.

            "Anywhere you want to go first?" She asked still hanging onto his arm. Dante looked down to her. "Okay, we'll play it ear."

            The large two floored mall was crowded with people busily doing last minuet Christmas shopping. "Hey look, a chocolate sale." Trish pointed out. "The way to a mans heart....." She started.

            "Is not through his stomach." He winked.           

            "Okay, how about the movie store?" Trish led the way into Suncoast Video.

            "Alright, I can handle that." Dante commented.  

            While Trish was checking out the specials, Dante was distracted into the Anime section. "Marry X-mas" Caught his eye as he pulled out the DVD. "Whoa." He said aloud looking at the cover with two women scantly dressed, in Santa costumes on the front. "'Tis the season'." He snickered.

            "Find anything?" Trish came up behind him.

            Dante jumped and quickly shoved the DVD back onto the shelf. "Nope, nothing at all." He grinned facing her.

            Trish raised an eyebrow. "Riiiight."

            "You?"

            "Nah."

            "Well lets go then." Dante pushed. 

            Back in the traffic of the mall, they continued on their way. "Oh a candle store. We'll need a couple. Why don't you wait out here while I go pick up a few." Trish left without waiting for an answer.

            "Suuuure, I'll just wait right here." Dante looked around and saw that he was right next to the whole Santa display. "Great." He sighed.

            A little girl with pigtails that was waiting in line to sit on Santa's lap stared at Dante for a moment. She then looked to Santa, then back at Dante. Her eyes flickered between the two.

            Dante saw this kid staring at him and started to whistle, rocking on his heels, trying to ignore her. But she kept staring at him; she would glance to Santa, then back at him. "What?" Dante finally asked.

            The little girl hesitated before asking her question. "Are you Santa's son?" Her small voice came.

            "What?" He asked confused.

            "Well, you both have white hair and red suits and black boots." She explained.

            "Uh, no. Sorry kid." He paused smiling, "I'm a demon hunter."

            "Ohhhhh," she looked wide eyed. "What kind of demons?"

            Dante crouched down. "Well you see that big fat guy up there on that big seat." He pointed.

            "You mean Santa?" She whispered.

            "Yup, he's the next one on my list."

            The little girl paused a moment blinking, she suddenly shrieked. "Mommy!" She cried running off.

            Dante chuckled to himself standing back up. "Kids."

            "Hey, sorry, crazy lines in there." Trish came back.

            "No prob, just keeping myself amused."

            "Well that's always good." Trish again took his arm as they walked down the mall.

            Trish glanced into the stores she passed. Red and silver balls gleamed in the store lights. The gentle jazz made the mall seem almost hazy, despite the many people hustling about.

            "Ooo Trish." Dante's pause brought her out of her daze.

            "Huh?" Trish turned to the store window he was gazing in. "Dante." She whined smacking him playfully.

            "Heh heh, why don't we go inside?"

            "Dante!" She called after him following him into Victoria's Secret.

            "How about this one?" Dante held up a strappy red velvet teddy, with white fur around the top.

            "When _hell_ freezes over." Trish said, ice coating her words.

            "Oh there won't be any time for freezing in _this_ outfit."


	2. The gifts, the mistletoe kiss

"Oh there won't be any time for freezing in _this_ outfit." He chuckled.

"Can we go now?" Trish said irritated.

"Oh _now_ you want to go?" He grinned.

"Come on." She nearly had to drag him from the store.

"No fun for Dante." He pouted. Trish just rolled her eyes.

"Now is there anywhere else that you have to go in the mall?" Trish looked over her list, all the items were checked off. She sighed, satisfied with herself.

"Nope, I'm good."

Trish paused a moment. "You mean you aren't going to get me anything?" She narrowed her blue eyes.

"For what?" He looked down to her scowl. "Oh _Christmas_ stuff?"

"Dante Sparda so help me if you—"

"Hey don't worry your pretty little head about it."

"That's what I'm here for."

"Well maybe I already have my shopping done. Ever think of that?" Dante cocked an eyebrow.

"No. It would be illogical."

"Well, step outta the norm my darlin'." He put an arm around her shoulders as they made their way out from the mall. Trish loaded the trunk and the Lexus drove back to the Devil Never Cry.

Dante helped Trish unpack the bags and bring them into the house. He was all smiles. Trish looked at him suspiciously but had too much to do to find out what was wrong with him. "I'll be upstairs wrapping, don't come up for a while." She said sternly and headed up the stairs with bags on her arms.

"All right, I'm just going to go out to get some eggnog." Dante backed up to the door.

"We already have some in the fridge!" She called from the top of the staircase.

"We need alcohol to go in it!" He hollered back and shut the door behind him. "JeezusMaryAndJoseph I have nothing for her!!!" He scolded himself as he jumped back into the Lexus and spun out of the driveway.

Seventy miles per hour was the minimum on the highway for Dante Sparda. "How the hell can she expect me to know what to get her and to remember to get her anything at all?! What the hell am I going to get her?!" He yelled at the windshield.

He took a long sigh and wracked his brain for ideas. _Perfume; not likely. Clothes; don't know the size. Jewelry; could work, but expensive. Alcohol; it would be nice right now, but she'd be pissed. Could stop at a bar real quick, maybe meet up with some old buddies—getting off track. Presents. Trish. Shopping. That damned mall. It'll probably close any minuet. Gotta hurry. _In the midst of his internal ramblings, Dante barely noticed the blue flashing lights in his rear view mirror. "Ah shit." He pulled the Lexus over reluctantly. This world pissed him off more and more each day.

The lanky officer of the law got out of his patrol car and took his time to walk up to the Lexus. Dante gritted his teeth and rolled down the window. "Do you know why I pulled you over?" The young cop had a southern drawl and smacked his chewing gum between him teeth. He shone a flashlight in through the window.

Dante ran a hand through his hair to restrain his boiling anger.

"Sir, do you know how fast you were going?"

"No, but I'm sure you do." Dante plastered a smile.

"You were going eighty-miles-per-hour-in-a-fifty-five-mile-per-hour-zone." He enunciated each word.

"I'm sorry, I'll try ninety next time and make it a felony."

"Sir, I do not appreciate your tone of voice. Could you step out of the vehicle?"

Dante knew that if he got out of the car then he would murder that cop in twelve different ways. "Look, I'm just trying to find something for my partner for Christmas on _Christmas Eve. _I'm not going to be able to get a diamond and the stores are going to close if I don't—"

"Partner? Sir, are you aware that it is illegal to marry a member of the same sex in this state?"

"WHAT?!" That did it. In a flash Dante whipped out Ivory, reached out the open window and grabbed the officer by the shirt and shoved the gun under his chin. "What the hell is your problem?!" He lowered his voice to a growl. "I just need a god damn Christmas present at the last minuet for my _girlfriend._ I'm not gonna wanna face her tomorrow empty handed, are you? So I need to buy her something to save my life from her wrath. And _nothing _is going to stop me from doing that. Just get back in your damned car and be on your way." In another instant he released the staggering cop and hit the gas, sputtering back onto the highway. Within moments, Dante was long out of view and turned off onto the exit, avoiding any further conflict the police force.

The Lexus skidded into a freshly vacant parking spot. Horns sounded all around him as the people waiting for that spot cursed out their window. Dante smiled giving them the finger as he headed for the mall. He ignored the chiming music and the Salvation Army bells at the entrance. He tilted his head and threw open the doors to the mall he was just in thirty minuets prior.

He strode right passed the Santa display and screaming kids. He was on a mission. And he would not fail. He had another thirty minuets until Trish would be getting suspicious. He had to make this fast. He rounded the corner from the food court and into the mall itself. Dante was bombarded with rushing people and signs declaring sales and various Christmas decorations.

Dante threw his hands on his head. He still had no idea what to get her! He looked at his watch. The mall would be closing early on Christmas Eve, whoever came up with that obviously wasn't a man. Dante tried to walk hurriedly and glanced into each window, not sure what he was looking for, just knowing that he needed to find something fast.

Lo and behold, there it was; the perfect Christmas present for Trish. Dante stood stunned in front of the store window. It was just so perfect. "Thank you God." His voice cracked. He had been listening to Trish whine and bitch about wanting the first season of JAG on DVD for the last two months. It had always been sold out of the stores she insisted on looking into, and was always too expensive for Dante's taste. And here it was. _On sale_, no less. His smile beamed from ear to ear as he strode into Suncoast Video.

Dante's goofy smile dropped quickly as he saw an older fat woman reaching for the last copy in the store window. His eyes widened. "_Noooooooo!_" He took off at a run, hands reaching out in front of him. He was too late, and the fat woman was too damn fast. Dante crashed into the Santa's village display as the DVD box barely brushed his fingertips. He was soon buried under boxes of worthless DVDs and little porcelain figurines.

The store grew quiet. The lady with the JAG box inched away. "Sir! Sir! Are you all right?" A young female worker ran up to the Devil Hunter that had an avalanche of Christmas paraphernalia over him. "Sir?" She pulled boxes off of him.

"It's all right. Just leave me here." Dante stared blankly.

"Did you break anything?" She peered around him.

"I'm lying in a pile of porcelain. What do you think?" He sat up wearily.

"I mean anything on your…self." She looked at him from beneath thick lashes.

"Oh. Well, no then." He smiled coyly. "But I have an awful bruise on my—"

"What's all the commotion?!" The store manager bustled out of the back room. The rest of the store returned to its business. "Good Lord! What's happened here?!"

The girl helped Dante to his feet. "Wait!" As soon as he was able to stand he took off after the woman with the JAG DVDs at the other end of the store. "Wait! I will give you 50 bucks for that!" He panted.

"I don't think so. This is the only copy that I can find, and I've been shopping _all_ day." She held it clutched it close to her chest.

"So have I! I've been shopping all day for my four kids and their mother! She'll be just heartbroken if she doesn't have that. You see, our marriage hasn't been so great and this would really help things, it would really make her so happy, at least for one day. At least for Christmas, then our kids can enjoy the day with no fighting and play with the few toys that their parents managed to afford." Dante gave sad puppy dog eyes.

The fat woman gasped. "You should be ashamed of yourself then! I saw the way you were flirting with that employee up there! Think of your poor wife at home who has to take care of those four kids while their father is off with wasting their money and gallivanting around with some harlot! Have you no respect?" She started hitting him with her purse.

"Ow! Ow! Fine! Screw off!" He barked, chasing her away.

"Sir?"

"What?!" He spun around.

"We need to discuss the bill for all of those porcelain figures in the store window." The store manager and employee stared at him with cold eyes.

Dante's shoulders sagged. He let out a long sigh. "Sure. Why not."

Dante kicked open the front door the Devil Never Cry, though Dante felt numb and near tears at the moment. He had been to three malls after that one and still had found nothing but elbows in the side and empty windows. He was tired, cranky, sore, and dreaded facing her in the morning. Trish waltzed into the room with a confused look. "It took you three hours to find a bottle of rum?"

Dante snapped. He dropped to his knees and hugged her waist, face nestling beside her belly. "I'm so sorry!I couldn't find it!Fat people are faster than they look!Porcelain hurts worse than bullets when its lodged in your ass.I went to three goddamn malls and near everything closed as soon as I got there!I had to pay twenty bucks for a parking space that was in the same timezone.I bribed one family for theirs.I'm prob'ly being hunted by the police!I just couldn't get a hold of it,I'm so sorry!" He said all in a blur.

"Dante…what the hell are you talking about?" She looked down oddly at him.

"You were right! I shouldn't have waited so long and no I didn't get you anything. I tried to get you something tonight, I found the perfect gift! But some lard-ass smacked me to the ground and I spent all the money I had left paying for damages to the store!"

Trish's stomach was convulsing. Dante looked up to her. "You're _laughing _at me?" He glared.

"I'm sorry. This is just—too much." She tried desperately to hold in her laughter but found it impossible. She burst out, tears almost spilling from laughing so hard.

Dante got to his feet, trying to find his dignity. He brushed off his chest. "Well I don't think it's so damn funny." He sniffed.

"No—no it's not. I'm—sorry—" Trish couldn't stop laughing.

"Well I will be upstairs, drowning in the bathtub if you need me."

"No, wait." Trish managed to get her laughter under control and held onto Dante. "Ok." She took a breath. "I'm good." She looked up at him with a wide grin.

"What are you smiling at?"

"_You_. You went through all that just to find me something for Christmas?"

"Well…you sounded like you'd kick my ass if I didn't get you something." His voice dropped.

"You just wanted to make me happy and you know it. You…" She paused for effect. "_Love_ me." Her smile widened at watching him squirm.

"I do not. This was strictly professional." He sounded childish.

"Professional huh? I'm sure." She leaned up and kissed him passionately on the lips. Her kiss spread warmth throughout his whole body. She leaned back abruptly. "Oops. Guess I can't do that if we're just professional huh?" She traced her fingers in circles on his chest. "Oh and I guess that little red velvet piece that I got from Victoria's will just have to stay a secret." She turned from him and headed upstairs.

"Wait! Let's not be irrational! I love you Trish! Come back here! I said it! I love you to pieces! I'll love you over and over!"

"Too late now lover boy." She winked from the top of the staircase.

"Triiiish!!!" Dante lowered his head with a loud sigh. "Hell no, I did not just go through all that tonight for nothing." He jumped up the stairs two at a time. "Trish! It's time I give you what I really had planned for your Christmas present. And it involves lots of—" He threw open the door to find Trish draped on his bed, wearing that little red velvet teddy. "—love." His jaw became disconnected from his mouth. His eyes grew large.

"Good. I knew you'd admit it." She sucked on a candy cane, crossing her legs.

He smiled wickedly. "Tis the season!"

Fin


End file.
